So, we have these motorcycle gangs in Nagano. They’re not dangerous, just obnoxious. These gangs consist of skinny teenage boys who ride around on souped-up noisemakers wearing surgical masks. To prove their outlaw status, they rev their motors to ear-splitting levels, run red lights and impolitely weave as they casually motor through downtown streets. They also ignore mandatory helmet laws. They’re universally detested for the noise and anti-harmony they create. But almost every night of the week, they’re out hoping to scare a little old lady or two.
Where are the police, you might ask? Word on the street is that they are under orders from national law enforcement not to chase these malcontents because to do so would be too dangerous (considering the damage caused during the LAPD’s numerous and infamous high-speed chases, this policy might have some merit). But instead of finding other creative ways to tame the boys and their bikes (talk to their mothers? grab them while they’re having a group smoke outside the convenience store?), the police merely circle the downtown area with their lights flashing (Japanese police cars always seem to have their lights flashing) in what seems to be a slow-motion and never-ending dance.
Well, tonight something changed. Along with the familiar oncoming roar of one of the bikes, a siren filled the air. Then, at relatively low speed, a bike passed, followed by a police car in lukewarm pursuit. Normally, everyone pretends to ignore the boys on bikes. But tonight, everyone turned to look at the “chase.” And the crowd reaction? Everyone laughed.
I wonder why the change? Did word come down from on high that it was finally time to start cracking down? Or did some local cop finally snap and decide he’d had enough?
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Cabin Fever
Spring feels just around the corner, although in reality it’s still another month away. I remain deep in hibernation mode, sleeping longer hours and having little luck dragging myself out of the apartment in the morning for some exercise before work.
The Siren Call
Nagano is abuzz with talk about the Starbucks that will be opening this summer near the station. Poor Tully’s (already established here) just doesn’t have the sexy brand power of the green and white siren.
An article in a local paper last week told of a woman who collected 3,000 signatures on a petition asking Starbucks to come to Nagano. Turns out, according to a Starbucks rep, the company already had plans to do so. Hurry up, the impatient fans cried! Hosting the Winter Olympics was so last millennium; in order to be a truly important city, Nagano must have a Starbucks.
Be Very, Very Afraid
I can’t decide whether to laugh or cry about how pathetically easy it is to mock the U.S. government’s new ready.gov web site.
The site, created by the Department of Homeland Security, offers tips to help Americans prepare for the terrorist attacks that are expected ANY DAY NOW!
Apparently, (and, to paraphrase Johnny Carson: I did not know this) you should move away from a nuclear blast.
In an effort to be a good citizen, I added some additional text to the original (see orange text above) that should clear up any misunderstandings.
Ready.gov also helpfully informs us that there is less radiation the further you move away from the epicenter of a “dirty bomb” blast. Please, for the love of god, stay as far away from these bomb targets as possible (The only target currently listed on the web site is Austin, TX, but I’m sure that’s just a temporary oversight and more target information will soon be added.). Also, you should minimize time spent frolicking in radiation.
Random Links
Domo Darko. Starring Domo-kun, and set to Gary Jules’ beautiful remake of Tears For Fears’ Mad World, which was used in the movie, Donnie Darko. (Another Domo-kun site, this one explaining that when domo-kun is in a bad mood, he breaks wind.) Thanks for the Domo Darko link, Greg.
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The Kids look more gorgeous than ever. Someone please put them back on TV on a regular basis.
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If there’s anyone (after the Bush administration, of course) that deserves to be relentlessly mocked, it’s television news. Here’s a recent bit from Jon Stewart’s excellent The Daily Show that manages to kill two birds with one stone.
Governor Domoto In A Poppy Garden
I really like this photo, which was taken by Joi Ito. I had to crop the original photo to work in this context; unfortunately, the crop doesn’t look as good as the original, full-sized photo (which you can find here).
The woman in the photo is Chiba Governor Akiko Domoto, one of a rare breed of independent, reformist leaders in Japan. Chiba Prefecture borders Tokyo, and appears to have a relationship to that famous city similar to the one between New York City and New Jersey (at least in terms of popular perception).
I like her pose (and poise), and the camera dangling from her neck. And I like that even though I can’t see her face, I can imagine a smile.
What America Wants…
More than 90 percent of the Turkish public opposes allowing U.S. troops to use their nation as a northern front from which to wage war on Iraq. And yet the U.S. government continues to use strong-arm tactics and financial bribery to convince the Turkish government to go against the wishes of its people.
How can the U.S. act this way and still claim to support freedom and democracy? This is only the latest (and certainly not the most egregious) in a long line of American foreign policy actions which contradicts the values America supposedly holds dear. How can Americans be surprised at the rising tide of anti-American sentiment throughout the world?
The U.S. government is certainly on a rampage when it comes to trampling the free will of sovereign peoples (Americans included) as well as trashing the remaining vestiges of good will toward America.
When exactly is it that we’ll all start feeling safe?
Scissor Sisters
Keep your ears open for Scissor Sisters. Their debut album will be out sometime soon. An advance copy of said album mysteriously ended up in my possession here in Japan, and I’ve been listening to it non-stop for the past week.
Their cover of Pink Floyd’s Comfortably Numb as channeled through the Bee Gees has already been generating interest. But the whole album is excellent.
A few songs from the album are posted on the band’s site, but the quality is not so great. Head over to their label’s site for a chance to listen to (or download) a few good-quality MP3s.
Skinny Bitch Causes Stampede
On the tasteless side in light of a recent club tragedy. And yet…
New Whitney remix causes stampede at gay club
NEW YORK — 34 people at Club Limelight were seriously injured in a stampede Sunday night that began when the DJ at the gay nightclub spun a popular new remix of Whitney Houston’s “Whatchulookinat.” Patrons inside the club had already filled the dance floor to capacity when, upon hearing the new mix, the crowd of over 100 people standing in line outside the club pushed past security and on to the floor as well.
“It was completely out of control. 500 Half-naked men cramming in and pushing up against each other just to dance to Whitney. All things considered, I’d do it again,” said witness Bryan Hayes.
There were boys jumping off the mezzanine level to get to the dance floor. “It was literally raining men,” quipped James Malone, another witness.
Bombs and Buds
I finally finished The Botany of Desire: A Plant’s-Eye View of the World, which is an excellent and highly-recommended read (thanks for the tip, Tama!). Author Michael Pollan looks at the symbiotic relationship between humans and plants, focusing on four specific plants and related human desires — apples for sweetness, tulips for beauty, marijuana for intoxication, and the potato for control. The marijuana section was especially good, with ruminations on how the allure of pot might be explained through it’s ability to temporarily interrupt memory, and why that isn’t necessarily a bad thing.
Memory is the enemy of wonder, which abides nowhere else but in the present. This is why, unless you are a child, wonder depends on forgetting — on a process, that is, of subtraction.
Last week, I zipped through Live from Baghdad, a quick, enjoyable — though ultimately shallow — look at the 1991 Gulf War written by Robert Weiner, who was CNN’s Baghdad producer at the time. The book is a great fly-on-the-wall look at events in Baghdad in the months leading up to the start of the war, and of the first week or two of actual fighting. It’s a great read for anyone interested in television news, and is certainly timely (it makes current events seem like a bad Hollywood sequel). But it suffers from a lack of critical thinking as to the quality and consequences of CNN’s groundbreaking coverage of a war from within enemy territory. The author is dismissively laudatory in dealing with the issue, as if the mere fact that CNN was able to pull off such a feat is all that matters.
Finally, I read Gore Vidal’s Dreaming War: Blood for Oil and the Cheney-Bush Junta, with a heavy heart. Vidal is one of my favorite authors. He’s written brilliant fiction (Myra Breckinridge) and superb non-fiction (United States collects the bulk of his terrific essays). But, as this somewhat dotty collection of polemics against the American empire shows, his famous wit and razor-sharp mind have lost a good measure of coherence. It’s disheartening that Vidal is not in fighting form when he’s most needed in the ring.
Currently, I’m finishing the final book in the amazing Gormenghast trilogy. Next, I’ll be opening either Alex Kerr’s Dogs and Demons: Tales from the Dark Side of Japan or Augusten Burroughs’ Running with Scissors (thanks for leaving it behind, Sam).